Wouldn’t it be great if you could get one for your car today – always there for you, supporting you, massaging your back like an orthopaedic sandal; one that wasn’t coloured a boring (no hard feels, Gramps) brown and tan but blue or yellow or pink?
They’re vestiges of a time when we caught taxis more than Ubers – and more often than not it was in those taxi rides where we’d see them most. There, or across the driver’s seat of your grandpa’s Mitsubishi Sigma, beads of tan and brown punctuating the murk of worn blue-grey velour. If you were lucky, you’d sit on it when you went for a pretend drive in Grandpa’s car while he mowed the front lawn and watched on, or he might have even taught you to drive on it for real. If this wasn’t your experience, though, you’ve probably lived a life resigned to only imagining a beaded seat cover’s nubbly caress.
When the free market lets you down, it’s time to DIY. We asked Melbourne maker Gemma Patford to teach us how to make our own awesome beaded seat cover. Here are her step-by-step instructions. Thanks, Gemma!
Choose your own colour combination. Go two-tone or as intricately multicoloured as you like. If you can’t find coloured beads, you can customise with acrylic spray-paint.
You will need:
This step is optional but it sure is fun! If you can’t find beads in the colours you want, why not paint and decorate your own?
Cut a good length of thread and attach a needle to both ends. Place four beads in the centre of the thread. Take one end of the thread and reverse-pass it through the last bead. Pull firmly to create a small diamond shape.
Get two more beads. Put one bead on the left thread and one on the right thread. Take another bead and reverse-pass both ends of the thread through. Pull firmly. Your row of beads will begin to grow! Repeat until the centre line of your first row of beads is 15 beads long.
Once you’ve completed your first row, feed three more beads onto the right-hand thread. Then reverse-pass the left-hand thread through the last of those three beads. Pull firmly.
This is where I changed colours. Place three beads onto the thread closest to the end of the row and reverse-pass the second thread through the last of the three new beads. Pull firmly.
Take the thread that’s now on the left and pass it through the second-to-last gold bead in the previous row. Pull firmly.
Add one bead to each thread and reverse-pass the right-hand thread through the left-hand bead (the bead closest to the gold row). Then pass the same thread through the next gold bead in line. Repeat until you finish the row.
Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Watch your seat cover grow.
Now you can taper the design of your seat cover so it hugs your back comfortably as you drive. I started to taper when my cover was 14 beads long, but you can customise your cover to suit your car’s seat. To taper, bring your beading in by just one bead on both sides. Simply stop one bead shorter than the previous row and start a new row. Repeat steps 6, 7, 8 and 9 to make three or four rows.
Continue to taper and lengthen, taper and lengthen. When your cover is 18 beads long, bring your beading in again by just one bead on both sides. OK, OK, and one more time: when your cover is 24 beads long, bring your beading in again by just one bead on both sides. This narrowest part will be the upper-back / neck section of your seat cover.
Continue to grow your seat cover until it’s as long as you need, or until you run out of beads. Finish off your cover by tying a strong double knot either side of the final bead. To hide the excess lengths of thread, simply weave them through the adjacent beads and trim.
Hot tip: To attach your beaded masterpiece to your car seat, simply remove the headrest, thread the neck rest through the two metal prongs and reattach it. Otherwise, tie on loops of elastic or another kind of strong thread or string.