Nissan Skyline GT-R 1999 Review

"This is serious, do not say anything, they mean business and... Oh my God, your car has data-logging. Don't let them search the GT-R."

It's freezing cold and raining and my feverish cameraman is stuck out in the woods without a coat and I've just been pulled over by the cops and been told by my translator that the car I'm driving is set to become a star witness in my own speeding prosecution.

Safe to say we've had better days, but our current predicament is just one of the many disasters we've experienced in trying to get the last-ever Skyline GT-R up a remote mountain, hours away from civilisation.

Rewind a few days earlier at Nissan's Zuma factory and everything seemed so promising.

In front of me stood the cleanest, most original polar-white 1989 R32 Nissan Skyline GT-R I'd ever seen and, with just 60,000km on the clock and the keys in my hand, it felt like I was about to unlock an experience I've waited all my adult life for.

Except the battery is flat.

Three hours later a lovely recovery man arrives and diagnoses it's not just the battery but a defective alternator that's the problem. No problem, we say, please replace it and let us be on our way.

"Big problem," replies the man as poor luck has it there's not a single alternator for an ‘89 Nissan anywhere in Japan.

And, like that, two glorious, meticulously-planned days with the original Godzilla GT-R turn to dust.

Forty eight hours later, the R32 has long gone and morphed into a glorious metallic black R34 Nissan Skyline GT-R and we're feeling pretty smug again.

Like the first car, the R34 we have today is said to be completely original save for a larger rear exhaust, but instead of being pristine the black R34 we have is well used and wears every one of its 120,000km.

Shorter, broader and a little heavier than the R33 it replaced, in the metal – like an ageing family hound – the dog-eared R34 is loveable all the same.

Its squared-jawed, sharp-edged looks, complete with flared front and rear arches, are still as striking today as when the Skyline GT-R first rocked up on the performance car scene back in 1999.

If anything, off the back of a starring role in the Gran Turismo gaming franchise and numerous testosterone-fuelled car movies, Godzilla's grandson looks almost exotic – but only if you stand at the right angle.

Deviate from that and you'll be confronted by a gawky two-door sedan that no designer in their right mind would ever pen today.

Not that looks matter. The R34 is nothing less than royalty in my book and only days earlier at Zuma I met one of the very men who could have built this car's engine.

After exchanging polite pleasantries, I began lightly grilling him on the famous gentleman’s agreement that capped power for all Japanese performance cars to 280HP (206kW).

Despite 18 years having passed since the last cap R34 GT-R rolled off the line he still refuses to spill the beans, only adding that he and his colleagues remain proud when an original car's smooth-spinning RB26DETT merrily exceeds the original car's 206kW and 392Nm of torque on the dyno.

Overshadowing that twin-turbocharged 2.6-litre inline six, as ever, is the fast Nissan's chassis hardware, with both the ATTESA all-wheel drive and Super HICAS four-wheel steering standard kit.

Today, the ever elegant 18-inch alloy rims look chronically under-tyred with 245/40 R18 Dunlops that wouldn't do nowadays on a Golf GTI.

I might have said a brief prayer before I cranked the ignition but – a miracle – our Skyline GT-R is in rude health and fires up into life, with a deep meaningful idle.

Not something that could be said for Damo this morning as he lowers his tired and weary flu-ravaged carcass into the GT-R's bucket seats.

To say he is feeling unwell would be an understatement. He groans and whimpers as the R34's tech-laden chassis firmly deals with expansion joint after expansion joint on the highway – it's painful to watch, but he refuses to cancel the shoot after losing two days due to a broken car. It's now or never.

Originally, we had planned to drive to Mount Fuji – a source of great spiritual inspiration, not just to Japanese people but for car fans around the globe as this part of the country has some of Japan's best driving roads.

Luckily, a chat about said roads with a Nissan engineer warned me off both Fuji and many of the well-known famous or popular driving roads.

Apparently for the last few years the cops have been trying to tackle the underground street racing and drift scene, imposing big fines for those drivers who even dare to stop in areas where anti-social driving had been spotted.

Hence, we peel off to a top-secret road only two hours outside of Tokyo.

Most people come here for the walking and stunning views of Mount Fuji from afar but we're just here for the road that winds and coils up to the mountain’s wooded summit.

Today, as luck would finally have it, the road at the top is closed following a devastating typhoon that hit it days earlier. Unfortunately, as soon as we dare unpack any camera equipment the winds pick up and it begins to pour.

While I feel awful for Damo, this is a blessing in disguise for the R34 as it laps up this kind of weather.

Today is the first time I've properly driven an R34 in anger and I'm happy to report it's nothing short of an intoxicating experience.

Initially, if you're familiar with the most recent breed of hot hatches, the GT-R's power delivery is underwhelming.

Stab the throttle at low speed and there's little response until around 3000rpm, when the big coupe's first turbo comes on boost. The pace then is pleasing, but nothing more.

Then, just as you're considering changing up, the second turbo awakens and kicks in with such violence and voracity you no longer doubt its supercar-humbling abilities, but that final burst is all too brief and it's too easy to smack the GT-R's 8000rpm cut-out.

The R34 was claimed to hit 100km/h in around 4.8 seconds, before topping out at 252km/h – incredible back then but pretty tame compared to the 2.5-second dash the latest R35 takes to hit 100km/h and a long way off its 314km/h top whack.

Back in '99, the Nissan family sedan’s interior could easily be overlooked thanks to the inclusion of the advanced dash-mounted MFD (Multi-Function Display) that, admittedly, I thought was the coolest thing to ever grace a car's cabin.

Today, like carrying an old Nokia brick, it looks faintly embarrassing.

Learning how much boost, oil temp, lap times and how many Gs you're pulling also smacks of childishness and it feels silly that there's not even a rudimentary sat-nav system.

At least the cheap computer graphics brighten up the acres of dull grey plastic.

Moan aside, the utterly functional cabin does do something right, offering a near-ideal driving position behind the wheel.

The pedal weighting of all the controls is evenly matched, the clutch is light and the Getrag six-speed surprisingly slick, light-shifting and accurate.

Which is handy, as the mini hillclimb we've found on the side of this Japanese mountain demands plenty of gear changes to keep that turbo inline six on the boil.

Narrow, greasy, poorly surfaced and with vicious mid-corner bumps, this road is a real challenge but one both the driver and car relish.

The R34 does that wonderful thing only the very best handling cars do. It flatters your modest abilities and makes you feel, just for a passing moment, you might actually be a driving God.

The rear-biased ATTESA that can shuffle up to 50 per cent of its torque to the front axle ensures not a single Nm is wasted even in these teeming wet conditions.

Combined with the rear-wheel steering – the effect of which is barely perceptible (in a good way) – it also shrugs off any tendency for the GT-R's nose to push one and the Nissan feels far lighter than its 1550kg mass suggests and far more responsive to the throttle than a car with its level of power and torque should.

Perhaps most remarkable is the way it engages at far lower speed than most modern sports cars that only come to life at eye-widening velocities.

Speaking of which, it was only a matter of time before the sound of a whistling, gravelly RB26DETT working hard for its living would get us into trouble and after exiting a tight hairpin flat I'm confronted by cops flagging me down on the road.

Embarrassingly, the cop car in question is a very pedestrian Daihatsu Terios – nowhere near a match for Godzilla-san.

What follows is a tense negotiation between Al (translator) and a very nervous, uncomfortable-looking police man.

Suddenly, the cop turns to me and looks deeply into my eyes, slowly shaking his head.

By now I'm wondering how many weeks I'm going to spend in jail following the realisation I have a dash cam that's been running during not only my banzai run up the hill only moments earlier – but hours earlier when I wanted to see if the GT-R's standard 180km/h speed-limiter was still active.

Before I begin pleading for my liberty Al begins to laugh. The cop begins to laugh. I begin to laugh, despite having no clue why.

I eventually explain the 'joke' to a shivering, feverish Damo, who until now has been out hiding in the woods. Apparently, there had been a spate of killings in the surrounding towns and villages by what was believed to be a serial killer.

Driving a black R34 GT-R, I apparently fitted the description. Damo didn't laugh when I told him they thought I was a cold-blooded sociopath. In fact, he actually nodded and mumbled in agreement – probably something flu-related, I told myself.

Before we embarked on another climb up the mountain the cops stopped us again, but this time it was to tell us another typhoon was about to hit and it was now too dangerous to be up a mountain.

I point out the Nissan's all-weather ATTESA all-wheel drive and its unflappable handling but I'm not entirely sure the man I'm talking to has completely ruled me out as a murder suspect, so we all make the decision to head back to Tokyo.

On the way the roads remain treacherous, with cars spinning out of control in standing water on the highway. The GT-R, meanwhile, tracks dead straight.

Crawling along the outskirts of the city I’m reminded how enjoyable it is at slow speeds, but suddenly realise how smooth the last Skyline GT-R can be to drive, even in crowded urban environments.

On a day full of challenges, the iconic Nissan never felt anything less than special or as involving as it did up the mountain, making it one of the most remarkable cars I've ever driven.

How much does the 1999 Nissan Skyline GT-R cost?
Price: £50,000* ($A97,000)
Engine: 2.6-litre inline six-cylinder twin-turbo petrol
Output: 206kW/392Nm
Transmission: Six-speed manual
Fuel: N/A
CO2: N/A
Safety rating: N/A
* Original price (in UK)