Mercedes-Benz S-Class 2014 Review

It’s more fuel efficient than a Toyota Aurion, has more pulling power than a Ferrari 458 and is longer between the bumpers than a Toyota LandCruiser.

It also dispenses its own perfume, massages its occupants, reads the road ahead and even steers itself. In fact the new Mercedes-Benz S-Class will do just about everything a luxury production car could be expected to do, and then some.

But it costs as much as an inner-city apartment, and is a less prudent investment. It also sells in numbers low enough to see it placed on the endangered species register, and is as technologically complicated as the timer on a 1980’s VCR.

Yet it’s hard not to fall in love every time you get behind the wheel.

There’s a lot to be said for a car that makes you feel special. Even at this end of the market most feel like anodyne facsimiles of one another, and are little more than larger versions of their lesser siblings. But the new S-Class is a step beyond. It’s bristling with technology, sumptuously comfortable and perfectly confident at high speeds.

The big four-door’s 4.7-litre twin-turbo V8 makes 335kW at 5500 revs and 700Nm from a low 1800rpm all the way to 3500. It’s adequate mumbo in anyone’s terms, and even in a car tipping the scales at 2029kg is enough to score an impressive triple-figure acceleration time of 4.8 seconds.

Driving the rear wheels via a column-shift seven-speed auto the S500 L is adaptable via Benz’s usual tri-mode array. However, the transmission makes the occasional ‘clunk’ when reengaging top gear after coasting. It also surges slightly under initial throttle input, even in its most economic mode.

And the eccentricities don’t stop there. The steering, despite feeling completely organic in motion, resists input pressure during long sweepers, almost as if it goes to sleep from boredom. Keep the inputs coming, however, and the steering feels perfectly natural, and beautifully weighted.

The brake pedal lacks modulation at the very end of its travel which makes soft stops difficult to achieve. When chauffeuring VIPs those last few inches shouldn’t be jerky, and far cheaper cars achieve a blend of both. However, the brakes are impressively strong, and show no signs of fade in even the most enthusiastic circumstances.

As you’d expect of a cruiser like this, there’s no mistaking the lateral weight transfer during changes of direction, particularly in Comfort mode where the AIRMATIC system takes a moment to react from the steering’s input. There’s also a slight delay in the stereoscopic cameras reading the road ahead, the suspension sometimes not adjusting in time to quash the jar from fragmented sections of black top.

But in spite of any minor character flaws the S500 L is a stellar experience at the wheel. It’s easily the pick of the German trio and is head and shoulders above the competition in regards comfort and amenity. The interface between man and machine requires some familiarisation and isn’t always intuitive, but it doesn’t detract from the fact that every last piece of it works to enhance what is a beautifully presented cabin.

The sumptuously soft leather, the goose down headrests, the level of adjustment and the perfectly metered climate control system feel superior to that found in an A8 or 7 Series.

It’s simply a generation ahead, and feels closer to the now defunct Maybach or British-built Bentley.

Also raising the bar is the Burmester High End audio package which, even listening to digital radio, offers a crisp, rich timbre and powerful base. It hooks up flawlessly via

Bluetooth streaming and is a joy to listen to in conjunction with the Pandora music app.

The spinning tweeters on the inside of the front doors are a nice touch.

Unfortunately, this particular audio unit is a ($9900) option, and joined other add-ons fitted to our test vehicle including Exclusive Package upholstery ($8950), AIR-BALANCE suspension ($800), Rear Seat Comfort Package ($5500), Front Seat Comfort Package ($3875),
Front Seat Entertainment Package ($2200), and Heat Insulating Dark Tinted Glass ($900). To save you the maths, that’s an ‘as tested’ price of $342,125... before on-road costs.

Driven around mostly urban areas, the S500 L returned average fuel economy figure of 12.2L/100km. Not exactly Aurion-esque, but still lower than the published ADR urban cycle figure of 12.9L/100km. Playing its part in keeping fuel use in check is a quick-firing idle stop-start system, which is eerily silent at the traffic lights.

The Mercedes-Benz S500 L sets a benchmark not only in its class, but of its time. It’s one of those cars we’ll look back at as a yardstick of quality and performance, and perhaps also for its eccentricities. It’s a lovely machine and a surprisingly rewarding drive.

2014 Mercedes-Benz S500 L pricing and specifications:
Price: $310,000 (plus on-road costs)
Engine: 4.7-litre eight-cylinder twin-turbo-petrol
Output: 335kW/700Nm
Transmission: Seven-speed automatic
Fuel: 9.2L/100km (combined)
CO2: 215g/km (combined)
Safety Rating: N/A