Parent Advice: The dos and don'ts when pulled over by the police with kids in the car

With flashing lights and a police officer approaching the car, a complete novelty for my kids who subsequently clapped their hands in excitement at the time and spoke about it for weeks afterwards, for me, with my perfect driving record and being a stickler for the rules resulted in my anxiety levels going through the roof.

I became flustered, I got snappy when my kids asked what was happening and without reliving the ultimately uneventful experience (a random breath test), I’d just say that I was not the parent who explained the situation to my kids in a calm and reassuring manner, nope it was definitely not a ‘teachable’ moment.

Well, truth be told, it did teach me a few things:

And with number three in mind, I went straight to the pros - aka other parents. One who did it right and another, who like me, didn’t because we all know that we learn from our (or other people's) mistakes, right?!

Lee was pulled over by the police for low-range speeding.

“There were road works so the speed limit had been lowered but it was during a time where although the signs were still up, there was no work being done so I just hadn’t realised.”

He said when the police pulled him over, with his son in the backseat he acted a bit too defensively.

“When the police explained what I’d done wrong, I argued with them. I began debating whether the signs should really matter if there was no work being done and that it was an honest mistake.

"Unfortunately, my argument didn’t stack up and the fact that I’d entered into a debate and got worked up about it didn’t work out too well fine wise either.”

Lee also said he was totally embarrassed that he’d acted that way in front of his son.

“I was a pretty poor role model to say the least. I got caught up in the moment which is no excuse and I acted terribly.”

His advice, “remain calm, smile, nod and just cop it on the chin, no pun intended.”

Mum of three, Lisa who was pulled over on a public holiday for a random breath test, says she used the experience as an educational exercise (i.e., exactly what I didn’t do).

“For some reason I get pulled over quite a lot for breath tests, so it didn’t worry me when it happened with the kids in the car. But because it was the first time they had been in there though, I decided to use it as a bit of a live action education session.”

Lisa explained to her kids what was happening and why and even recruited the police officer, who agreed to explain how the test worked.

“I think communicating with your kids about these sorts of things is really helpful. It allows them to learn things they may not have had the chance to learn until they are much older, and it also is reassuring for them to know the police are out there trying to help keep the roads safe,” Lisa says.

So, I think it is safe to say that from mine and Lee’s failures and Lisa’s parenting success story, that while we can't control everything that happens out there on the roads, we can control our reaction (or be like Lisa).

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