Can we stop the car shaming: Why dissing people's ride is not okay

COMMENT

Yes, that’s right being shamed (whether it’s privately or publicly, intentional or not), for your ride is apparently viewed by some people as perfectly okay.

Take, for instance, an acquaintance of mine, who while in conversation with me shared that she wanted to buy a new car. As someone who had only just done this myself, I decided to share my experience. Despite my raving review, this person told me that the brand of car I had purchased was not anything she or her husband would ever drive.

“We’ve just never really liked them. They look cheap,” I was informed. Ouch.

But you know what? I didn’t react, in fact, I didn’t say anything. Because a) Despite my car not actually being what I’d call “cheap”, for me it isn’t just about the price tag anyway b) I love my car and c) What respectful person actually makes this type of comment to someone anyway?

Well, I know exactly who, a car shamer. A very specific individual who will judge and make assumptions about someone based on their car and then share this in a manner that makes them feel superior but really just makes them look like a d*ck (yes, I’m talking about you, acquaintance).

Truth be told, as a victim of car shaming for decades now, I’m familiar with this type of person and this experience but regardless, it is still hurtful.

It’s hurtful because let’s be honest, our cars are often inextricably linked with our values and also our income, so it is very personal.

While growing up my mum drove us around in fifth-hand, rust-laden Datsun bombs which were at times admittedly a tad embarrassing (especially when arriving at high school with the side mirror falling off and being held up by some type of rope).

For me, the Datsuns were symbolic of my single mum who didn’t really care about car aesthetics and who was also the sole income provider, meaning she bought the best option she could. So, when someone made a comment about any of my rides, well it felt like I was being judged for something I had no control over.

Now though, my family’s two cars, a Toyota Kluger and Hyundai Tucson aren’t exactly in the same category. No, they are not luxury cars by any means but I’m most definitely not embarrassed driving around in them and I shouldn’t be put in a position by anyone else that suggests I should feel this way.

But this is (or at least should be) the same whether your car is a rust bucket, or something at the opposite end of the car spectrum because car shaming someone is just tacky and gross, far more so than any car in existence.

While you don’t see many Datsuns on the freeway anymore, many new brands that are low-cost are becoming more visible and it appears they have now become the face of vehicle shame (and Hyundai’s according to my acquaintance).

With a preconceived prejudice of being cheap and nasty, they are often not only viewed this way but spoken about in this way too.

But the car shaming issue isn’t just linked with driving in a car that is viewed as low quality or cheap, it can also be the opposite.

Enter the excited exclamation, “You bought a new car!” and the series of questions about its features and then cost, with the associated, “Oh, they must be rolling in the dough,” assumption made with it (while never a problem of mine), can also be just as uncomfortable for those at the centre of it (and not always correct).

And then you have another type of car shame definitely becoming more prevalent, the non-electric, or hybrid car shame that happens when you purchase a new, but still only petrol or diesel engine car and the disappointed shakes of the heads that can be seen, as if you are killing the planet single handily.

So, with car shaming spreading like a new epidemic, it might be time to remember that like people, our cars are all unique, so how about instead of the judgement, we just keep our eyes firmly on the road ahead because car shaming, simply put, is just a really shitty thing to do.

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