MINI Cooper 2018 Review - International

Me generation
Can there be a brand that more effortlessly captured the ‘I want it my way’ zeitgeist of the early 21st Century than MINI?

When BMW took over the reins in the late 1990s and began planning its revisioning of the tiny, front-engined classic, it decided that it wanted a UK production line that could build cars like Smarties.

From its launch in 2001, each vehicle coming down the line was different from the next; a yellow One D in left-hand drive could be soon followed by a right-hand-drive red Cooper S, and so on.

This allowed the German brand to offer enough personalisation options – in the form of contrasting roofs, graphic-adorned mirror caps, white alloy wheels, bonnet stripes, interior ‘Salt’, ‘Pepper’ and ‘Chili’ packs and more – that, supposedly, there were a million different combinations.

This, remember, when the only BMW-MINI body style you could buy was a three-door.

Fast-forward 17 years from the born-again MINI’s appearance and we know two things. One, that every other manufacturer worth its salt has to offer a number of models in its range that can have lurid roof-and-bodywork paint combinations, or fancy interior dash pads in eye-catching colours, or a wealth of graphics.

And two, that MINI itself has expanded to incorporate different body styles and even more personalisation options, meaning it emphatically remains the market leader when it comes to ‘cool appeal’ among a younger buying demographic.

And on that theme, here’s the 2019 model year 3-Door, 5-Door and Convertible models. All of which can now be subjected to an almost infinite amount of personalisation, courtesy of what is known as MINI Yours Customised.

Advances in 3D printing and laser lettering mean you can have side scuttle panels with your name embossed into them. Or a dash pad that features a skyline of your favourite city. Or door puddle lights that can project your signature onto the floor near the car.

Indeed, precisely how you want your MINI is now only seemingly limited by your imagination, as Yours Customised opens the door to a world where no two MINIs should ever be alike.

Blink and you’ll…
If you’re wondering why we’re kicking off the review of the MINI Cooper S by talking about whether you want ‘Bruce’ writ large near your side repeater indicators, then that’s because the car underneath all this glitzy customisation showmanship is little changed as part of its midlife model updates.

MINI has given it new LED headlights that now feature a circular LED daytime running lamp pattern and circular indicator rings too, a handful of new body colours like Starlight Blue and Solaris Orange, and some really attractive and fresh 17-inch alloy wheel designs.

There’s also revised graphics for the interior infotainment screen and the (optional) head-up display, the transference of the driving modes selection from the old rotary collar at the base of the gear lever to a chrome toggle switch on the centre console… oh, and Union flag rear lights.

This last one is contentious in the extreme. They’re LED clusters and there are no other choices if you want your rear lights to be LED; it’s the British flag or bust. Now, in some markets, the alternative is to have the old halogen rear lamps with the circular design as an option, but they’re not confirmed for Australia yet.

In an era when we’re regularly asked to vote on whether we need a new national flag to get rid of the Union emblem (historical note: it’s only technically called a Union Jack when it’s on the jackstaff of a British naval vessel) on our own ensign, and when Britain’s international stock is at its lowest ebb, this seems to be a risky move by MINI, which is – when all’s said and done – essentially a German outfit nowadays.

Nuts and bolts
Anyway, enough of such talk for now. Elsewhere, there are a few mechanical updates to cover, such as the European entry-model MINI One getting one of BMW’s own 1.5-litre turbocharged three-cylinder petrol engines, instead of a Peugeot-Citroen-sourced 1.2 triple.

Of course, this doesn’t matter to us, as we only get Cooper models and above, but there’s also the adoption of a seven-speed dual-clutch transmission (DCT) as the optional gearbox on all variants of the MINI bar the Cooper SD (which, again, we don’t get in Australia, save for in the Countryman range which isn’t part of these updates as it’s a newer car), which retains its eight-speed torque-converter automatic.

Both auto transmissions go under the banner Steptronic, but the DCT promises faster shifts, improved acceleration and better fuel economy and lower CO2 emissions.

Otherwise, the Cooper S 3-Door remains pretty much as it was pre-facelift. The 141kW 2.0-litre turbocharged four-cylinder engine remains in situ, driving the front wheels through a six-speed manual as standard.

That leads to a rapid 0-100km/h time of 6.8 seconds and a 235km/h top speed, which places the Cooper S firmly in the ‘hot hatch’ category for these smaller cars.

Behind the wheel
And the 2019 Cooper S is definitely an exciting car to drive, although it brings with it a veneer of civility and comfort that has been missing from previous generations of BMW MINI.

Without recourse to adaptive dampers, the hatchback’s fixed-rate springs and shock absorbers do a fine job of smothering out low- and high-speed lumps and bumps in the asphalt, whether it’s in town or out on an open highway, while conversely the car’s body control is excellent when you start throwing it into bends on your favourite challenging route.

Most of the major facets of the car are superb, too, like the slick and chunky six-speed manual, the well-judged throttle response, the powerful and beautifully modulated brakes and that muscular 2.0-litre engine.

You’ll not often lament a lack of pace in the Cooper S, which has both enough flexibility for meaningful in-gear acceleration and a hunger to rev out smoothly to its redline. And, in either instance, it feels bullishly quick.

The steering is also brilliant – but only in Mid mode, where it has a natural weighting and plenty of feel. Knock the car into Sport and the tiller becomes artificially heavy in your hands, almost unpleasantly so. This is a 2010s manufacturer trait with electric power steering systems: hefty weighting apparently equals sporty.

But increased electrical resistance is no substitute for genuine feedback and the MINI’s Sport mode robs it of what information is coming back to the driver from the front wheels.

And now you start to notice that although the chassis is tremendously willing, it’s not terrifically thrilling.

Everything the Cooper S does, especially when it is on the limits of grip, feels ever-so-slightly within itself; as if MINI is deliberately holding the 141kW car back so that it doesn’t tread on the expensive toes of the 170kW John Cooper Works range-topper.

While you can certainly have an entertaining back-road thrash in a Cooper S, it’ll never smear the biggest smile on your face during such an exercise – a fact exacerbated by the car’s strangely muted soundtrack, only a few discreet pops and bangs coming from the exhaust in Sport mode to remind you that you’re in something that’ll go beyond 230km/h if you can let it.

Not perfect
There are further bugbears with the MINI 3-Door. Such as, it remains a criminally bad piece of packaging.

Rear-seat passenger space is laughable with anyone of average height installed in the front chairs and despite the fact its 278-litre boot capacity figure seems middling by class standards, it is a strangely shallow and feeble-looking cargo area, that can take two carry-on flight bags at best.

But, really, none of this griping actually matters. People who love MINIs will continue to lap up the 2019 versions.

Despite the woeful packaging of the car, the dashboard design is still way in advance of anything else in the segment and it’s made of the highest quality materials, so just sitting in the Cooper S makes it feel like an expensive car (which it is, at around $40,000).

The cutesy appeal of the exterior looks and the sheer, mind-boggling breadth of the customisation options also ensure that each and every MINI will feel special and exceptionally personal to the customer who decides to take a punt on it.

Same car, different day, then, for the MINI hatchback. And given the phenomenal global success this automotive icon has enjoyed in the 21st Century, can you really blame the company for deciding not to throw the baby out with the bathwater during this round of midlife updates? No, us neither.

How much does the 2019 MINI Cooper S 3-Door cost?
Price: $40,000 Estimated)
On sale: July
Engine: 2.0-litre turbo-petrol four-cylinder
Output: 141kW/280Nm (300Nm on overboost)
Transmission: Six-speed manual
Fuel: 6.0L/100km (ADR Combined)
CO2: 138g/km
Safety rating: Four-star ANCAP (2014)